People respect decisiveness, and I tend to be indecisive - depending on my mood. If you haven't slept well, if you're anxious, if you're feeling down, these are all solid reasons you may not be at your most decisive.

You might be at your least decisive. And to some extent I think we get indecisive when we know we aren't at our best. Indecision can be seen positively as choosing when to choose, and recognizing that you are not best disposed in this moment to do so with clarity, foresight, and resolve. We don't (I hope) drive drunk, and nature has installed a similar mechanism in us for decisions in general, in regard to the status of our inner chooser and how its energy is doing, how it's vibing, if you will. Are we in a frame of mind to make a decision that we will like later? And do we even know enough, or should we gather more information?

Seeing all this is self-compassionate. Don't pummel yourself for having trouble making a decision. There's probably a great explanation for why it feels that way right now, why deciding feels troublesome.

So the trick I use is: if I recognize the decision is mine, and is required in this moment (oh, you know, because someone's staring at me waiting for an answer), I do my best to relax for a few seconds. You get it: take a long breath or two. Just because decisiveness is respected, indecisiveness not so much, and you need to be decisive right now and are feeling absolutely the opposite, doesn't mean either of the following things: 1) you can't be decisive now, 2) being decisive means making an instant decision.

You can take a few moments and think. And as long as you're not outwardly wavering and backtracking, as long as you process this decision internally and produce an answer, that's going to seem decisive. So you can take a minute. Don't worry that it makes you seem indecisive. That's the least important consideration, and it isn't even true.